What Has THG Been Doing for the Last Three Weeks?!

While sending somebody THG links for an upcoming story/interview request I realized that I have not posted anything here since about three weeks ago when the world was abuzz with talk of the kegger on the White House lawn. (That's not to say I've been away from writing about food and drink, but followers of my Twitter feed know that.)

So, you may be wondering, what the heck has been happening at THG HQ over the last few weeks? The answer in one word... lots!

The first big event since last we spoke was the latest installment of what has become an annual tradition on par with Thanksgiving here at Casa THG... the European Trash Cinema BBQ. This little gathering got its start a few years back when our UK pal artist Adrian Salmon was in the States for the Baltimore Comic-Con and we introduced him to a world filled with Old Bay, steamed crabs and beer can chicken. Unfortunately, I also became reacquainted with Seagram's VO Gold that night and given the way the evening ended it's amazing there was a second ETP BBQ... or ETPBQ as they've become known.

But my wife is nothing if not patient, understanding and forgiving so each summer has seen this spectacle return, usually accompanied by mountains of pulled pork, other grilled goodies and sweet and tasty desserts that my pals (including Tomb it May Concern mastermind/Tough to Kill co-author David Zuzelo who gifted me with a massive box of Batman comics and graphic novels that I'm wading through and will be posting about at Exploitation Retrospect) gleefully devour into the wee hours.

This year's gathering was intimate compared to previous events with just eight friends joining us for the evening (past events have featured three times that number), but that didn't stop the food and beer from flowing. Armed with my copy of Adam Perry Lang's Serious Barbecue (my new bible and go-to cookbook) we rolled out my homemade pulled pork, a sweet and spicy whiskey barbecue sauce, beer-bathed brats with grilled onions (which will be making their return for NFL kickoff weekend), my father-in-law's classic potato salad (kicked up with a touch of bacon), spareribs and not one but two kinds of cole slaw (traditional and Ina Garten's amazing Blue Cheese Slaw, a new fave in this house).

The event was a rousing success though the ribs disappointed me. Though pals gave them the thumbs-up both Chris and I thought they were a bit tough and chewy, not as tender and tasty as my usual slabs. Frankly, I blame the full slabs I purchased at Costco. I usually purchase the Costco-butchered ribs which feature thick, meaty portions with nice marbling and enough fat to deliver juicy and delicious ribs. The pre-packed Smithfield slabs I purchased seemed leaner, perhaps too lean, and never gave me the shrink from the bone I look for when initial cooking the ribs in the oven before they get finished on the grill. Lesson learned.

Naturally, I've also been busy making sure that copies of the latest (and final) issue of THE HUNGOVER GOURMET have been making their way out into the world. Due to some unexpected client projects this has been a bit more glacially-paced than I would like, but we're getting there. There's still time to order copies from our on-line store or send $3 (cash or money order, no checks) to PO Box 5531, Lutherville, MD 21094-5531. Early feedback on the issue has been very positive with Louis Fowler's epic culinary trip through Big Lots being singled out by many.

Speaking of projects with a lengthy gestation period, I'm also pleased to report that after three-plus years our kitchen renovation is about 99% complete. We began renovating the room back in the summer of 2006 but never finalized the backsplash due to our need for a new roof (heavy, windy storms were causing our kitchen ceiling and walls to leak like something out of a horror flick). With that major expense finally checked off our list earlier this summer we were able to get the backsplash installed and begin thinking about the last touches needed to complete the room, namely a new light fixture over the kitchen table and a fresh coat of paint on the ceiling. I'll be happy to have these pieces complete as we close in on our fourth anniversary here at the house.

That pretty much brings you up to date on what's been going on over the last few weeks. I don't know about where you live dear reader but we're smack dab into the dog days of summer here in Baltimore and my office is sweltering thanks to the various computers and printers, not to mention the "closed door policy" intended to keep my two-year-old at bay. I promise more posts to come in the days ahead, including my take on JULIE & JULIA, more coffee chatter, and even – dare I say it? – a THG website update.

Till then, relax, it's only cooking.

FANEX Returns at Baltimore's Senator Theater

As some of you may know, Baltimore's single-screen movie house The Senator has fallen on hard times and "the end" was supposedly at hand. I'm not sure what's happening at this point... there had been talk of the city taking over the historic theater to avoid the auction block but I'm not sure what the latest is.

The good part about the current problems has been that it has forced the powers that be to re-examine just what the hell they've been doing and for the first time in the eight years I've been here somebody finally got the idea that maybe plunking first-run features in there wasn't the best use of the building.

Anyway, recent weeks have seen a wide range of flicks hit the screen at The Senator and I just found out that our old friends Gary & Sue Svehla of Midnight Marquee and FANEX fame are going to program the schedule the weekend of May 1. Here are some of the highlights...

Friday, 5/1
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ALIEN FACTOR @ 7 PM
SUSPIRIA @ 10:30 PM

Saturday, 5/2
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THE INVISIBLE GHOST @ 10:30 AM
BASKET CASE @ 1 PM
FANEX FILES: HAMMER FILMS @ 3 PM
HORROR OF DRACULA @ 5 PM
SUSPIRIA @ 10:30 PM

There are some additional, locally made, low-budget flicks playing as well. For more check out the Midnight Marquee website.

The Cure for Hunger?

I am not what you would call a huge fan of doctors. Trust me, it's not some highfalutin moral outrage over the cost of medical care but more an irrational view reinforced by my own personal experience through the years. Specifically, an illness during my freshman year in high school that the doctor originally said I was "faking". Turned out to be non-viral hepatitis resulting in me spending a week in the hospital being poked, prodded, injected and isolated, then sent home with little more than some drugs and a note that said I could only go to school half-a-day for the next few months.

Guess I wasn't "faking".

So forgive me if the idea of eating in a medically-themed restaurant doesn't exactly appeal to me.

I might be willing to overlook my feelings for a good burger, but I'm not sure if Arizona's Heart Attack Grill is a good eatery or just a good concept. In an era where you can't turn on a news report or fire up Drudge or CNN without reading something about health (today's insight from the UK is that obesity might be a virus that you "catch" like the common cold), the folks behind the Heart Attack Grill have thrown caution to the wind and serve up their signature Bypass Burger (available in multiple beefy tiers) and fries cooked in lard with a knowing wink.

Owner "Dr. Jon" patrols the eatery in a white lab coat and stethoscope while the artery-clogging delights are served up by busty waitresses in the kind of naughty nurse costumes you can purchase from Adam & Eve... or, uh, so I've heard.

A quick perusal of some reviews suggest that I need not book a flight to Phoenix in order to check out the burgers at Heart Attack Grill (one write-up suggests "If you like less than mediocre food while porn is being thrown in your face, you'll find it here"). Even the positive reviews suggest that the patrons are not going here for the food, but the chance to oggle a busty babe without fear of being seen in a strip club.

While the Heart Attack Grill playfully uses its medical theme to poke fun at the experts and pundits who rage against a little food that's bad for you every now and then, a restaurant in Latvia embraces the whole medical concept to such an extent that even the photos make me uncomfortable. Like I'm watching HOSTEL and I'm just waiting for the dopey American tourist to be taken away and eaten by some Eurotrash cannibal!

Welcome to Hospitalis (even the name sounds like a crappy direct-to-video HOSTEL rip-off) where waitresses in stark white nurses uniforms, white stockings and red wigs serve up food in operating room dishes (I hope they don't use bedpans!) and drinks are delivered in syringes.

The eatery's stark, creepy design is heavy on bright whites and sterile-looking steel, not to mention booths that look like beds from a 1940s movie and clear tables adorned with large medical illustrations of skulls and anatomy.

Personally, I don't want to be reminded of medicine, hospitals, illness or the potential effects of what I'm eating while I'm dining. How about you?

When the Moon is Red the Dead Shall Rise

When I was going to school in Philadelphia back in the latter half of the 1980s, there was a five or six block stretch of Chestnut Street that was home to a handful of great theaters. And when I say "great" I mean dank, smelly shoeboxes that regularly offered up whatever horror, action or sexploitation was being released by Cannon, Empire or New World during that last, great gasp of cinematic trash.

I still recall going to see stuff like TRUE BLOOD, an oddball thriller starring Jeff Fahey and Sherilyn Fenn, while the decidedly urban audience playfully hurled insults at my friends and me. There was the night we were in one of the strip's classier theaters for a preview screening of some horror flick and found out that Keenan Ivory Wayans was in the theater next door screening I'M GONNA GIT YOU SUCKA! (we quickly ducked over and gave him a copy of Exploitation Retrospect, the drive-in movie newsletter I was publishing at the time).

But one theater in the neighborhood still holds my fondest memories of afternoons when I should have been in class or Saturday nights when we'd catch a flick before heading to a club to see whatever punk/garage band was in town. The Budco Midtown (now the Prince Theater) was home to two screens that regularly acted as a one-week-only home away from home to such trash as WITCHBOARD, BREEDERS, CREEPAZOIDS, NO MAN'S LAND, BURIAL GROUND and more. But it was the films of Italian splatter legend Lucio Fulci that regularly made me stop in my tracks and plunk down $5 for three hours of joy.

One of the films that I was lucky enough to catch on some insane double-bill was Fulci's GATES OF HELL, a non-stop mix of splatter and Lovecraftian jibber-jabber that isn't so much a film as it is a highlight reel of the master's trademark moments of mayhem and gore. Christopher George stars as a grizzled reporter (not to be confused with his frequent roles as a grizzled cop in other 80s trash fare like THE EXTERMINATOR and the equally brilliant PIECES) who who gets roped into stopping the armies of the dead from taking over the earth. Featuring some of Fulci's most notorious moments – a heart-stopping cemetery rescue, a surprisingly realistic drill to the head, vomited-up intestinal tracts, bleeding eyes, dead priests and more – GATES never disappoints.

So what the heck does that have to do with our trip to Georgia? Well, parts of GATES were shot in the sleepy Southern town of Savannah, GA, which inexplicably is supposed to double for the New England locale of Dunwich, Massachusetts.... a town that doesn't even exist. So who's to say it doesn't look like a distinctly Southern slice of Gothic architecture and lots of iron work? (One reviewer suggests that the film is so inept it's actually good, a claim I have a hard time arguing with.)

Knowing we were headed to GA in the coming months we made plans to hook up with Curt, an old pal, horror blogger and fellow member of the Eurotrash Paradise. We usually get to see Curt once a year or so during our ETP get-togethers but he wasn't able to make this year's Seattle trip so a mini-ETP get-together in Savannah seemed like a must.

Though Hanna was doing her best to dampen our day with clouds, rain and the occasionally whipping wind, we still had a great time walking around town and seeing such sites as the infamous house where the MIDNIGHT IN THE GARDEN OF GOOD & EVIL murder took place.

After a quick walk through town we made our way to the Moon River Brewing Company, a decidedly non-touristy brew pub where we felt it was unlikely to run into fans of Paula Deene or her spawn.

Driving and walking had brought on a mighty hunger and we worked our way through the restaurant's menu which succeeds in being familiar without offering the same old bar food. Fried Green Tomatoes (a favorite of Chris's since her days in her family's restaurant) were juicy and tasty, despite a slightly overcooked crust. Leek & Goat Cheese Cakes (shown at right) were a unique and great combination of flavors, though the leeks should have been chopped more to eliminate the stringiness and a sauce of some type would have taken them to another level; an accompanying scoop of lentils were dry to the point of dessication and seemed woefully out of place.

The Bayou Shrimp (right) fared much better, featuring shrimp stuffed with smoked kielbasa, baked and served in a sauce I didn't even need. (Side note... I really like the South's obsession with shrimp and sausage.) Curt and I both decided on the Lowcountry Crab Melt, which wasn't so much a sandwich as it was a baking dish filled with toast, crab salad, cheese and, um, cheese.

A couple Belgian-style wheat ales (Curt) and some Swamp Fox IPA (yours truly) topped off an excellent lunch that gave us the strength and courage to check out some of the Savannah-based GATES locales that Curt had scoped out.

While he wasn't able to pin down the location of the cemetery used in the film's opening (and even hardcore Savannahites were of no help) Curt did lead us to the staircase that John-John runs down when trying to escape from his now-zombified (?) sister Emily. (Forgive me if my recollections of GATES are rusty... it has been about a year since I saw it and my DVD is at home.) We also took video (which I'll post at a later date) of what we believe is the catwalk that one of the zombies jumps off during the film's whacked out running time.

After walking the streets that the grandfather of Italian splatter had walked, it was time to head out. The rains were whipping their way through the streets of Savannah and one could almost hear Fulci shouting for the effects gurus to bring in more sheep intestines for the next gruesome effect.

Report from the Road: Almost Home (Kinda)

I've lost track of what day it is from the road. We arrived at our destination in Oklahoma on Saturday afternoon and spent the next couple days visiting with my brother JT and his wife Nancy. As if getting to spend time with my best friend wasn't enough, they live minutes away from Head Country, one of my favorite BBQ joints in the entire nation. And, after spending the better part of two days eating McDonald's, Steak & Shake, and the Fairfield Inn equivalent of bagels this was a welcome change of pace.

Sunday the heat kept on climbing and the food kept on coming. JT and Nancy recently stayed at a bed & breakfast and had a dish called Creamed Eggs. Imagine, if you can, a warm, breakfast version of Deviled Eggs and you'll have some idea of how great Creamed Eggs are. Sunday dinner was a nice pork roast complete with sauteed squash, cheddar grits, and mashed tates (not of the cream cheese/sour cream variety).

After some last minute visiting on Monday morning it was unfortunately time to hit the road again. We altered our return route a little to see a different part of the midwest and we ended up putting in about 600 miles, getting from Ponca City, OK to Mount Vernon, IL.

It's about 7:30 local time and we've got about 800 miles to go. I've just had more Fairfield Inn coffee and bagels (about what you might expect from a hotel in Mount Vernon, IL) to fill my belly and it's about time to pack up the Escape for our last push. Knock wood, if all goes well we'll be back in our own bed tonight with a full day to recoup and get ready for this weekend's big European Trash Paradise World Con taking place in Hunt Valley, MD.

Pulled Pork and Eurotrash

Our good buddy David Zuzelo has been working on something called The Eurotrash Pinnacle Project over at the excellent Tomb It May Concern. In a nutshell, DZ solicited Top Ten lists from a variety of contributors in the hopes of figuring out what Eurotrash is tops for fans of Kinski, Naschy, Argento, Bava and Company. Earlier this week he featured the list of Groovy Age of Horror scribe Curt Purcell and I'm proud to say that yours truly's list gets the DZ treatment in yesterday's post.